Artwork by Zach Salas

Almost every evening I can remember from my youth, at least from when I was about 6 or 7, I would rush to the TV to watch re-runs of The Adventures of Batman and Robin on Cartoon Network.

To me, and to many children growing up in the ninety’s, this cartoon Batman was the Batman. The intro was the same each time; two thuggish silhouettes blow up a bank whilst robbing it. As they escape onto a nearby roof, a dark shadow drops down in front of them. Stunned, they turn to see the iconic dark shape of Batman, whose eyes narrow as he sizes up his prey. Every single time I watched that, it sent a shiver down my spine. Sadly, however, there came a time when Cartoon Network no longer showed the Dark Knight looking over the city, his cape billowing in the wind. On that day, I resigned that that part of my childhood would be locked away forever, and that I would never see my childhood icon again…

Yet, to my surprise, I was rewarded with that piece of my childhood on my birthday: I discovered the 2nd season of The Adventures of Batman and Robin, originally known as Batman: The Animated Series, on DVD. When I popped the first DVD in, I was instantly basked in the ultimate nostalgia. It was amazing, like reliving my childhood over and over again with each punch. Batman has always been my favorite superhero, and it’s utterly undeniable how awesome the Caped Crusader really is.

The first thing I noticed about the show, that I hadn’t really noticed when I was a child, was how dark the series was. It was like if the 40’s had been moved up to modern day, then pushed into a bucket of black paint. The film-noir aspect helped paint Gotham City as a bustling metropolis by day, and a dark, dirty, devilish place by night. One of the things I loved the most about the series was the Batmobile, because it looked like the love child of a Lincoln town car and a F-117 Nighthawk stealth fighter. The artwork of the series is amazing, and while it is dark, it is detailed and intricate beyond belief.

The second thing I realized was how intricate the voice acting was. Voice actor Kevin Conroy plays our iconic hero, and through subtle voice changes, playboy Bruce Wayne becomes the savior of Gotham. Each super villain, from the articulate Riddler, to the crazed Joker, is chilling and realistic, as far as super villains go. Mark Hamill, best known for his portrayal of Luke Skywalker in Star Wars, is simply the best Joker ever. Jack Nicholson was creepy, Heath Ledger was a madman, and Mark Hamil is the perfect mix between the two. This is why he and Kevin Conroy lent their talents to the recent video game hit Batman: Arkham Asylum, as the Batman and Joker respectively. Thanks to the special features, I found out that the actors were all in the same room when they recorded, and they all interacted at the same time, making the recording an electrifying experience.

The reason why this is the best portrayal of Batman I’ve ever seen, is because it is a perfect medium between all the worlds of Batman. The Adam West series is corny and lame, the comic books and recent Batman Begins and The Dark Knight are too dark and complicated, and Batman: The Animated Series is a mixture between dark realism and puns and action for the kids. Also, a lot of people don’t like Batman because Robin is a kid, and running over the rooftops in tights with a kid is something that raises a lot of eyebrows in today’s society. Yet this Batman portrays Robin as a college student, leaving out the awkwardness of a young boy in tights.

When you get down to it, Batman is a bit ridiculous. Is it unrealistic? Of course! But then again [news flash everyone] it’s a cartoon! It’s supposed to be unrealistic! How anyone can really take Batman seriously is beyond me. I mean, it just kind of kills the mood if you analyze everything Batman does. Yet if you let your inner child come out, you’ll find yourself biting your fingernails until the end.

artwork by Anna Becker

As autumn approaches and students return to school, television networks also return to work, brainstorming ideas for new shows and continuing existing ones.  However, this means letting some old or unpopular ones go.  When the Fox network decided to air Seth MacFarlane’s new Family Guy spin-off cartoon, The Cleveland Show, they had to make room in their Animation Domination block on Sundays.  Unfortunately, the show chosen for cancellation was King of the Hill.

Mike Judge is credited with not only writing King of the Hill, but also other comical works such as Beavis and Butt-head, Office Space, and Extract.  He, along with former Simpson’s writer Greg Daniels, decided to create King of the Hill in early 1993, after the successful run of Beavis and Butt-head.  Being a former resident of Garland (a suburb of Dallas), Texas, Judge decided to rename that town the fictional town of Arlen, and use it as the setting of his new cartoon.  Although Alren was a fictional town in a cartoon series, the King of the Hill writers wanted viewers to feel as if they were watching a regular sitcom, so they often went to Texas for annual research trips.  Judge also created many realistic people, hoping to use humor in conventional aspects of everyday life.

King of the Hill’s main characters, the Hill family (for whom the show is named) are small-town Methodists.  Hank Hill (Mike Judge) is a calm but strict father and husband who loves his job selling “propane and propane accessories” for Strickland Propane.  Hank’s wife, Peggy (Kathy Nazify, The Wedding Planner), is a Spanish substitute teacher who is good intentioned and open-minded.  Their son, Bobby (Pamela Adlon, Sgt. Bilko), is an overweight class clown who Hank claims “ain’t right”.  Hank and Peggy’s twenty-something niece, Luanne Platter (Brittany Murphy, The Dead Girl), lives with them and has a bubbly and fun-loving energy.  In the last season Luanne got married and had a daughter with a mellow redneck named “Lucky” Kleinschmidt (Tom Petty).

When Hank is not working or with his family, chances are he is drinking beer with his three friends in their block’s alley.  Dale Gribble (Johnny Hardwick) is often seen in his signature orange ball cap and shades, working as an exterminator and talking about his conspiracy theories.  Although Bill Dauterive (Stephen Root, True Blood) has a friendly personality, his appearance is not as appealing.  Bill is fat, bald, and often idiotic, living like a bum: alone and poor.  As for Jeff Boomhauer (also Mike Judge), he is a womanizing playboy who mumbles so fast it is hard to understand a word he says, except for the frequent “dang” and “man”.

Buck Strickland (also Mike Judge) is the gambling, alcoholic, womanizing owner of Strickland Propane, where Hank is assistant manager, working alongside Joe Jack (Toby Huss, Reno 911), Enrique (Danny Trejo, Grindhouse’s Machete trailer), Debbie (Reese Witherspoon, Walk the Line), and Donna (also Pamela Adlong).  At Strickland Propane, Hank takes his job, and his loyalty to Buck seriously.

Other secondary characters on King of the Hill also seem to have unique, but true-to-life personalities.  These characters include John Redcorn (an Indian healer who is often seen “healing” Dale’s wife, Nancy), the Souphanousinphones (The Hills’ Laotian, materialistic neighbors who often refer to Hank as “hillbilly” or “redneck”), and Cotton (Hank’s deranged, World War II veteran father who seems to dislike his own son).  Like other great cartoon series, King of the Hill has had many famous celebrities including Chris Rock, Johnny Knoxville, Willie Nelson, and ZZ Top featured as guests.

King of the Hill is the second longest-running animated television series (behind The Simpsons), and has been named one of the greatest by various publications including Entertainment Weekly, Time, and TV Guide.  However, with King of the Hill’s declining ratings, by January 2009, it was officially announced as cancelled.  In order to give a proper bon voyage, Fox decided to air a series finale on September 13.  The last scene was deep in accordance to the nature of the show, using a burger as a metaphor by showing Hank and Bobby both grilling in their yard.  When the last burger was being grilled, Hank said, “Well, looks like this is the last one,” leaving the viewer feeling kind of sad.

While this may not be the episode to watch if one has never seen King of the Hill, the episode, Hank’s Back Story (103rd episode), is quite funny and uplifting.  When Hank suffers from a fictional disease called “diminished gluteal syndrome” (a condition that has worn down Hank’s backside and has put pressure on his spine), he has to wear a prosthetic posterior.  When Hank’s friends and father mock his medical problem he decides not to compete in an upcoming lawnmower race, fearing he will embarrass himself.  Most King of the Hill episodes are outstanding, some even more so than episodes of The Simpsons.  If Hank Hill were to give his opinion on King of the Hill’s cancellation, he would probably say: “I’ll tell you what, that cancellation ain’t right!”

by Manny Perez

    Everyone loves when regular TV shows mix-up their air times, right? No? Yeah, well me neither. Lost, in the spirit of “ABC’s All-New Thursdays”, has decided it will be airing from now till May 29th at 9 pm instead of the regular 8 pm; thus throwing this reporter into at least one high-speed chase trying to get home on time, only to learn he still has an hour to spare.

9:07 – Good old Lost Island seaside. Jack is feeling off due to this completely warped schedule and is thus taking some medication to ease the pain. Kate welcomes herself into the tent and she starts talking with Jack about why Sayid isn’t back from the boat, but before too long Bernard is yelling for help from the shore. Apparently he sees dead people. Someone is floating facedown in the water, but no worry, it’s just the stupid doctor from the boat we all hate.

Meanwhile OTOSOTI (On the other side of the island) Locke, Sawyer, and Hurley, are playing Risk before being interrupted by an automated phone call “Code 14-J.” Taking their time, they go ask Ben if he would like to sign-up for a free MasterCard. At this, Ben jumps, grabs and pumps a shotgun, and tells the three to head over to the other house. “They’re here”.

We are treated to another “eye flashback” to the Sahara Desert. Ben is wearing a fur-lined coat and vomiting. Before too long two Saharans appear on horseback and try to capture him. As they frisk him, Ben, complying, reveals a small and harmless black tube-thing. Spinning in place he completely owns his arrester with a whack to the head with his extendable and very harmful tube-thing. He then uses him as a shield before the other Saharan can shoot him. Ben then knocks him off his horse, kills him, and then rides off on one of the horses. Ben is officially cool.

9:25 – The Locke Lot are fortifying the house, but before too long the military, aka the captain from the boat and the captured Alex, arrives. Three random Losties are almost instantly shot down outside as Sawyer ducks and jumps trying to get to Clair’s house – Aaron safe with Hugo at the moment. Her building is then hit with a missile and collapses.

Tozeur, Tunisia, Ben is asking for assistance at a hotel desk under an alias. Being the special guest he is, he asks the year before seeing Sayid on TV. It’s 2005 and Sayid is married – or was anyway, seeing as he’s off to attend Nadia’s funeral.

Back at Otherville, Ben, Locke, Hugo, and Aaron are staking-out and keeping away from the windows. Clair, much to the dismay of many people, I’m sure, is still alive and is hauled back to the house by Sawyer. As the group is huddling and awaiting the army to either charge-in or launch a missile, we hear the doorbell. Ah, it’s a recently-freed Miles – with a walkie-talkie. “They wanna talk.”

9:37 –Watching a middle-eastern funeral from a rooftop, Ben assembles a camera and starts taking shots of a bald guy. He then turns his lens toward the funeral only to find Sayid look up at him at the exact same time. Running out on the roof, Sayid tackles him and demands xplanations. Ben is apparently tracking down Nadia’s killer – the bald guy.

Miles is babbling, tries a lame divide-and-conquer, then tells about how they have Alex. This grabs Ben’s attention and he agrees to talk to the Captain, though with hesitance. After a bit of arguing, which Ben obviously wins (He’s Ben, remember?), the Captain brings out Alex at gunpoint. Ben proposes a counter-proposal – GO AWAY. “She means nothing to me,” Ben says wide-eyed.
Mark shoots Alex.

9:47 – Alex is on the ground and Ben is basically paralyzed. “He changed the rules,” he says softly. Going into one of his many hidden BenCaves before Sawyer can grab him, we get a flash-forward.

Drinking tea, Ben is following Ishmael, the bald guy, and Nadia’s murderer, through a busy market and into an alley. Ishmael loses him, turns the tables, and Ben gets cornered. Before Ben can get his message across to him, Sayid empties his pistol into Ishmael. “Who’s next?” he asks Ben.

Back in the house Ben comes back dirty and a bit ruffled. He has released The Monster and, charging like a huge locomotive made of electricity and smoke, it eats the Army. But before running off into the forest like the rest of the Lot in the house – Ben says goodbye to Alex.

Back on the beach, Daniel is literally sending a telegraph through the SatPhone in Morse code, as Jack has requested. Daniel, being incredibly honest says the helicopter is coming soon and that they are not to worry. Bernard, the know-it-all, accuses Daniel of being a liar, and correctly translates the Morse; “What are you talking about? The doctor is fine.” Jack is then mean to poor Daniel and he rudely asks him if he is going to help the survivors at all. “No.” says Daniel.

OTOSOTI, they’re in the forest and off to see Jacob. “I don’t know why I ever followed you wackos in the first place,” says Sawyer before going back to Jack’s camp, along with Clair and Hugo. But Locke needs Hugo to get to Jacob. They argue over him – pistol to pistol. Trying to avoid more disagreement, Hugo stays with Locke. So they’re off to see the Wizard with Ben, “Follow me.”

London, England – Ben enters a fancy penthouse suite. Charles Widmore is sleeping in his bed. Charles argues that Ben is not the victim; HE killed Alex. No matter, Ben has decided he will kill Penelope. “You’ll wish you hadn’t changed the rules.”

Afterthoughts:
    Although it wasn’t exactly good enough to justify a two-week hiatus, or the stupid schedule change, I liked the episode. The Monster finally decides to make an over due appearance. Ben is finally turning away from his quiet evilness to his cool evilness. And we even get to see Daniel some more.
    One thing I’m starting to notice is that a lot of people are dying now, but due to the rather huge cast, I’m starting to not care much. Sure, Alex was interesting and all, but emotionally her death was kinda empty. I’m not sure if the writers simply need to whittle down the chaotic aspect of the show (see the overabundance of OTOSOTIs), or that death is just good television. Either way, if it keeps going in this direction, I’ll start caring when it’s down to Vincent the Dog and Ben. Vincent will win, obviously.

[I CANNOT believe I missed the first half-hour! IT’S MICHAEL. How do I miss it!?]

8:30 – Michael puts a fully loaded gun to his head in front of his TV. It refuses to fire, TWICE. A news report breaks where it tells him about the fake 815 flight. Obviously, this is extremely odd so he goes and visits one of the now-dead Others, Tom. He lets Michael in, but not before sending his boyfriend away with a kiss. [Ha! Never would have guessed.]  Anyway, he explains how Widmore faked the plane “discovery”, (apparently Others can come and go). Tom asks about the gun, “Did the bullet bounce off your head? Or did it just not fire?” Michael wants proof of the hoax. Tom shows how Widmore got the bodies from a Thailand cemetery, bought the plane, and dropped it all in a trench. Tom wants Michael on the freighter. “I can’t go back to the island!” he says. But Michael is not going to the Island, he’s the spy on the boat and he’s supposed to kill everyone there.

8:47 – Michael is on a dock. He meets Crazy George from before and he tells Michael to report to Naomi. Michael is now Kevin Johnson. He receives a call from Tom and he reminds Michael how he’s supposed to be saving everyone on the Island and that includes his son. He later throws the phone in the ocean. He has a chat with Frank the pilot. Frank brings up 815 and how he thinks the people aboard might be alive. Tom has sent Michael a box, probably filled with guns. He hears shots on the deck. The people have tons of weapons and are shooting plates over the side of the boat. “Rescue” mission, huh? Michael takes his box up to somewhere important. There’s a bomb in it. Libby appears. DEAD Libby. Dead-because-MICHAEL-shot-her Libby. She tells Michael to not activate it.  He does, but not without saying goodbye. “I love you Walt.” It doesn’t detonate. A note springs out. It says: NOT YET. [I think I’ll destroy that Tom.]

9:01 – Michael is talking with Crazy George. He tells Michael how Walt is calling him from the communication room. He’s not. It’s Ben. They discuss that some of the people on the boat are innocent and that Ben wouldn’t kill innocent people. Ben would want a list of names though. After that he wants the Comm. Room shut off. Then the engine room. “Will you do that for me Michael?” Of course he will, he’s one of the good guys.

    Flash-forward to the present on the boat with Sayid and Desmond. “You’re working for Benjamin Linus?” says Sayid before he attacks him and sells him out to the captain. Cover? BLOWN.

    We’re back on the Island with Rousseau, her daughter Alex, and Karl. He has a bad feeling about the Ben-directed excursion, but Alex reassures him. Karl is SHOT. NO! Rousseau grabs a struggling Alex and they fling around a tree as shots hit around them. She tells Alex to be brave and that at the count of three the two of them are to run. She counts down; I widen my eyes as I expect the obvious. They both turn and Rousseau falls while Alex turns to the only defense she has left: “NO! DON’T SHOOT! I’M BEN’S DAUGHTER!” The End of half the episode.

Afterthoughts:
    I don’t think it would be possible to properly express my fury at this exact moment. Like I’ve said times before, this episode exposed Michael. MICHAEL people! And I miss the first part where (I’m guessing here) we see where Michael first headed on that boat and where Walt is. [Rips several phonebooks in half.] But from the small parts I saw, I can deduce that Michael made it inland, stayed in contact with at least one Other, lost Walt again, and was so unhappy with himself he turned to suicide (which failed for some crazy reason). Besides Michael’s story, Rousseau and Karl are now dead. That last scene between her and Alex was probably one of the most touching things in the show’s history. I mean really. It’s a wonder my laptop still works considering all the tears that had splashed over it during the course of the episode, from both Rousseau’s death and the fact that I missed Walt.

by Manny Perez

8:04 – Ok, so we’re on the board with Frank. We finally meet Regina, who’s reading an upside down book… odd. Frank brings Desmond and Sayid beans, and before we know it we’re back on the Island with Sun and Jin who are absolutely adorable talking baby talk. Jin wants to call his daughter Ji Yeon. Now we get a flashback or forward (Sun is the sixth???). SHE IS SHE IS SHE IS!!!!

[MacBook Air commercial! I know it’s pretty much useless, but the music is catchy.]

8:14 – We’re in Korea, Jin (Seventh?) is buying gigantic panda bears. [I agree with the vendor. Everyone DOES love pandas]. Back on the Island Jack and Kate are back from their little excursion. But then we’re back on the boat and Dez and Sayid are passing notes under the doors. Sayid reminds me of the spy Ben has on the boat. The note says: Don’t Trust The Captain. Back on the island, Sun starts asking Daniel [I swoon] serious questions and if they’re really going to rescue them. Sun walks back to the mainland and starts making some sort of plan involving Locke.

8:25 – Sun is packing… in Juliet’s tent. Juliet walks in on her looking for “vitamins”, so she spills the beans. Apparently Sun doesn’t trust the “new” Others and has decided to switch to Locke’s side.
We get a flash-forward and Sun is dashing to the hospital where the doctor tells her the baby is having some slight trouble. Jin, meanwhile, is catching a taxi, giant panda in hand. Through a series of quick and hilarious events someone takes his taxi and panda. Returning to the shop yields one reserved panda. He REALLY wants the panda and pays premium for it.
Back on the island Kate is giving Jin and Sun a map to Locke’s camp. Juliet decides to interfere. JULIET YOU WITCH. She spills the affair to Jin. Sun slaps her [YES!]

8:34 – Jin is obviously hurt, while Bernard hilariously bursts in. The two go fishing. Bernard points out that they’re the only two married guys. They discuss Rose’s cancer, Jack, Locke, good choices and good karma – they catch a fish.
Back on the boat, the captain wants to see Dez and Sayid. Helicopter is missing.  Regina is walking around in chains for some reason… she’s not going to jump!? SHE JUMPED. Dez takes notice and starts running at her but too late, she’s in the water. None of the crew tries to help and the captain, who turns out to be the muscley guy we saw occasionally, but he prohibits the crew anyway. Regina is dead.

8:48 - We’re still on the boat. Dez and Sayid are outraged by the death of Regina. Mr. Captain drops the Widmore name as the head honcho. The captain shows 815’s Blackbox, and tells them about the crashed plane wreckage, the box, the bodies. Apparently it’s a hoax, a very disturbing hoax, but one wonders where 300 bodies were found as replacements. This is why these people are looking for Ben – supposedly (remember the note).
Back on the island Juliet is apologizing. And she’s convincing.

We get another flashback. Sun’s giving birth [I look away]. We hear a pop. Sun gets to hug her adorable slimy thing, while Jin is still off trying to get there.

We’re back on the boat, it’s dark. Sayid and Dez are being moved to a cockroach-infested room, complete with headshot stain on the opposite wall. Thankfully a disobedient janitor is right across the hall. The camera is suspiciously sticking to him. Johnson? Wait he looks black… Could it be? IT’S MICHEAL. MICHEAL. MICHEAL.

[We get another MacBook Air commercial, but I don’t care. It’s REALLY MICHEAL.]

9:01 – We’re on the island [NO NO WRONG LOCATION] and Jin is making up. Sun has apparently ditched her Locke eloping plans and has decided to try to get help from the boat. “Is the baby mine?” Jin asks. Sun says, "yes." [Yay!]
Flash-forward. Jin is … doing something…  HE’S ON A BUSINESS CALL?! THE PANDA ISN’T FOR SUN?! Creep.
Sun is in her apartment with her new baby. Hurly comes a knockin’ Ha! They want to go see Jin… They go to a cemetery… What…? Huh? But we just saw him… He’s being a creep… [Sun gets teary; I get teary even though I’m lost] The End.

Afterthoughts:
     Remember how Lost got a bit boring after the second season due to pointless story plots that apparently went nowhere? Well, looks like those are coming back, but this time they make sense. This is enjoyable, yes? I agree.
    For one thing: Michael is BACK people! Know what this means? Walt. And not just Michael screaming his name every single second to my mute button’s pleasure, Walt the weirdo-psychic-kid the Others were willing to kill and be killed to get their hands on. Then, even after Walt, is Michael himself, and who knows what kind of shenanigans he’s been up to since the last time we saw him leave on that boat. Where’d he go? Why is he here now? WHERE IS WALT?!
    Then there are THIS episode’s questions: Like Jin’s death, or fake-death, or whatever is going on. And Regina’s brief, and apparently only, appearance. Ben’s spy, who I’m guessing was Regina or IS Walt. Then the whole faked Oceanic Wreckage thing.
Lost is about to start doing something it rarely does: give us answers. Frightening in its sudden appearance, I’m stunned and wondering if I’m worthy of such a high honor: knowing what the heck is happening.

By Manny Perez

8:04 – I come in two minutes late, panting as I reach to turn on the TV, fumble the remote and mistakenly change it to channel 9 [The Celebrity Apprentice!? NO!], before reaching 7 and watching Jack in a very Freddish mood directing the gang to split up. Juliet is in the rain and meets a ghost, at least I think it was a ghost.

8:13 – Yes, Ben is ALWAYS where he wants to be, informs us the pudgy-cheeked lady/not ghost, who also tells Juliet to kill someone. Weirdo whispers in the rain then Juliet flashes back (where’s the forward?). Apparently, she’s an emotional doctor. She’s on the island. She’s speaking with a recognizable dude, who I don’t exactly remember. Ohhh, GOODWIN. Then back to present in the rain. On The Other Side Of The Island (OTOSOTI) Daniel and Charlotte are looking at a map, they meet Kate and she makes an unpleasant face.

(iPhone commercial! Well, technically it’s an iTouch, but whatever)

8:25 – Apparently the SatPhone is out of battery, which explains their little excursion. Anyway, Kate looks through Danny’s bag before Charlotte unexpectedly knocks her out from behind. Fred/Jack is walking with Daphne/Juliet before we get another Juliet Flashback with Ben. Goodwin walks in on them talking about fetuses. Later she’s talking with her therapist (aka pudgy-cheeks) and she asks how long she’s been sleeping with Ben or Goodwin, one or the other, either way: GASP. She’s a pervert apparently (“I’ve followed you, watched you”), and tells Juliet to back off. OTOSOTI, Locke is carving up some animal of sorts, and Clair is starting to get talkative and asking about Miles. Locke serves Ben rabbit; he asks if it had a number on it [I laugh]. Ben explains to Locke how leadership works, and Locke hands him a dollar to help with the Miles Fund [I’m rolling on the floor]. Ben is going to show Locke something in exchange for some freedom.

8:38 – Juliet is having a picnic with Goodwin on the beach. It’s an affair. Ben has a crush on Juliet [Ick]. Goodwin wonders how Ben would react to learning about the affair: crashing Oceanic airliners perhaps. Back in the present, Jack and Juliet find a bloody headed Kate, who wonders why Danny and Charlotte would have gas masks. Juliet is GONE. OTOSOTI, while Locke and Ben are talking above ground for a change. Ben unveils a secret vault to Locke [combo is 361528 because I’m attentive], which contains a tape. It’s a tape of Mr. Widmore and he’s captured one of Ben’s people. Ben tells us Widmore would want to control the crazy healing powers of the island for his gain (the freighter is his). He hands Locke Widmore’s file. The man on the boat is… BLARG COMMERCIAL!

8:47 – Kate, the bloodhound, is on the trail in the forest with Jack. Juliet ran off to some abandoned cement building. Inside we meet… a flashback, and an awkwardly chirpy Ben. They have dinner together, and discuss Goodwin amongst the Losties. Switching back, Present Juliet is in the cement center with crazy alarm sirens [Danger Will Robinson Danger!]. Someone in a gas suit is trying to override it. Danny! [NO! Don’t shoot’Im Juliet!]

(Disgusting Cottenelle commercial. The one with the puppy warning everyone to be careful with their behinds, ugh.)

9:01 – Daniel succeeds in overriding and says he’s trying to disable the gas weapon [It’s Danny, I believe him instantly]. Juliet doesn’t. Juliet and Charlotte get in a REALLY nasty fight, but it’s fun to watch. Juliet pins her, Charlotte frantically tries to persuade her “He’s used it before!” [???]. Juliet seems convinced now, but alarms are going off like crazy to a count down.  HE DISABLES IT, GOSH. 
    Flashback, with Juliet telling Ben about a helpful doctor that could help with his tumor. But Ben takes her to some hill… it’s Goodwin, stabbed and clay looking. Who ever plays Juliet is such a good actor (Wikipedia credits her as Elizabeth Mitchell). Ben is so incredibly devious and decides to be blunt, basically saying: “Well, take a minute to finish mourning, then let’s head back to my place.” Back in the present, Kate, Jack and Juliet and her posse meet up. “These people are waging war against Ben,” she says. “And Ben is going to win” (incredibly creepy confidence in that statement). Jack and Juliet are a couple now. OTOSOTI, Sawyer and Hurly are playing horseshoes when they see Ben just waltzing around. It’s more disturbing than I can say.

Afterthoughts:
    Best. Season. Ever. or what? It looks like they’ve been shoving the less interesting characters under the carpet for now, and placing all the good ones right at the forefront. This is working out stupidly well, and I’m loving every second of it. Particularly Juliet, as the link-between the Losties and the now-debunked Others, I find her intriguing enough and now we hear about this whole love-square (Juliet, Ben, Goodwin, and Pudgy-Cheeks) that came almost out of NOWHERE. Thankfully, it wasn’t anything like that dumb Jack-Kate-Sawyer thing that got dragged out, but was short, actually interesting, and most of all included Ben, who I came to think of as almost asexual, and lacking in anything that resembles a heart. And he loves JULIET. Understand that this disturbs me quite a bit. He’s some kind of Montgomery Burns/Lord Voldemort/Hannibal Lector composite character and he’s in love. Not good. Juliet’s name suddenly makes a lot of sense now, and if it ends at all like the play, this episode is barely scratching the surface.
 

by Manny Perez

8:10 –
OK, Desmond is crazy. He keeps switching from the helicopter/boat to the British Army.
On the island: Daniel confirms the timespace-fluxuation thing – well, almost. Back on the boat, I freak out when I hear a voice that sounds like Walt, turns out it’s just some dude [disappointment]. More on him later, as it looks like he’s crazy too.

8:15 –
Sayid phones home. Desmond continues switching realities, talks to crazy dude briefly, talks to Penny. We switch back to the boat, Sayid hands the SatPhone to Desmond because Daniel wants to talk to him. Danny seems to get what’s happening to Dez and asks him some questions and gives him instructions to find him in 1996 [?] at Oxford University [?] [WHAT???]

8:25 –
More crazy instructions then SWITCHBACK. 2.342? Eloise? Past Dez goes to visit Past Danny at Oxford. [Oh God. the hair!] Standard “ha ha I don’t believe you” from Danny until Dez mentions Eloise. Turns out she’s a rat. He sticks her under a microwave thing. Zaps her with some light, which he explains almost like she’s sending her through time and after he puts her in … a maze? SHE TIMETRAVELED in her conscious? Switchback to present. Crazy George is awake and explains how he knows Penny OMG [sarcasm].

8:40 –
Switchback to 1996. Eloise died apparently during the switchback [!]. “Past Danny” says Dez can avoid dying if he can talk to Penny, well basically – but then ANOTHER switchback. Dez needs to talk to Penny on the boat too, and Crazy George can help. They’re escaping –then SWITCHBACK. We arrive at some haughty auction… Penny’s father is there. He gives him Penny’s address then – SWITCHBACK. George is helping them escape then – HE DIES, wow. Dez starts having the same symptoms [!!!].

8:52 –
Switchback to Past Dez. He flies off to Penny’s house and touchingly blabs to Penny that he needs her number. She gives it then – SWITCHBACK. He starts calling her on the boat (8 years later)… SHE ANWSERS! “Dez where are you?” [So sweet]. “I spoke to your friend Charlie” [Crying at reference to Charlie] “I love you Penny, I’ve always loved you, I’m so sorry, I love you” “I’ll find you!” “I promise!” [Blubbering at the sweetness of it all. The world is such a beautiful place] and… END SCENE. [Wipes tears away to see the screen]
Back on the island:
Present Danny is riffling through his notebook and it says, “If anything goes wrong Desmond Hume is my constant.” [Bad cliffhanger or food for thought?]

Afterthoughts:
Oh wow, that wasn’t confusing at all. Very interesting episode, full of specific and scientific explanations courtesy of everyone’s favorite nerd (or at least mine) Daniel! Just the way I like it.  Desmond has always been the freak among the Losties and I think this episode was rather fitting, but then again they did go for the cheap he might die angle. He has survived boat crashings, Hatch explosions, monster attacks, and probably some more, and the writers try to scare me with some time-travel headache? Pfft! Tell these writers it barely worked. I’m only slightly gripping my laptop.